Is that…a Walther PPK made of Valyrian Steel?

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Okay, let me explain. If you get the reference, just go with me on this.

I enjoyed the newest installment in the hoary James Bond franchise quite a lot. Skyfall is a moody, textured look at the character and icon of 007 — personally I found it a perfect addition to Daniel Craig’s tenure as the character. I’ve heard varying reports about whether or not this will be his last film as “dude’s old”. But if this is his final performance as Bond, this is a perfect way to go out. Exploring the last part of the hero’s career, and a true brush with mortality and frailty.

But I there’s one thing that is revealed, that concerns me.

Spoilers henceforth.

One of my favorite sections of the movie is the final act.  Bond retreats to the moors of Scotland, and we get a glimpse of his childhood — something never shown previously in any other film. [Not even the wacky-ass original Casino Royale.] There was something primal about him returning to his ancestral manse, on his noble steed [the Aston Martin!]. Some serious low-tech battle prep — followed by the usual helicopter explosions, high kill count, brutal kicks to the face and a knife fight [of sorts] — all the action required for the end of a Bond film.

It wasn’t until the second time that I watched the movie, that I noticed something.

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Right there, on the top of the gate leading to Bond’s family home.

A stag.

This can only mean one thing.

James Bond is a Baratheon.

I…I…don’t know how I feel about this.

This changes everything.

For the uninitiated, House Baratheon is from George R.R. Martin’s A Song of Ice and Fire, currently more popularly known through the HBO series, Game of Thrones. 

I don’t know how I feel, because the Baratheons are all, well… kind of dicks. [Or all kinds of dicks? How does that phrase work?]

Robert Baratheon: whoremongering drunk. Renly Baratheon: pompous fancy-lad. Stannis Baratheon: pompous grumpy-dad.

Not the most august of families — even acknowledging the political power they hold throughout the narrative. Does super-cool, badass James Bond really belong in this family?

Well….maybe, maybe not. But I do think their House words fit him to a tee.

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Okay.

Maybe I can get on board with this.

But if in the next Die Hard movie, it turns out that John McClaine is a Stark, Targaryen or Green-Apple Fossoway, I’m done.

DONE I TELL YOU.

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3 thoughts on “Is that…a Walther PPK made of Valyrian Steel?

  1. Patrick N

    I am totally okay with this crossover. And if you really think about it, the Baratheon boys are kinda just extensions and exaggerations of the aspects that comprise the ever-changing character that is James Bond.

    Robert – Bond is on the borderline of having a drinking problem. Let’s face it, other than saying his own name, he is instantly recognized for his drink order. And is it that much of a stretch to say he has “whoremongering” tendencies? Sure, very seldom you get the relationship that has some substance like with Tracy or with Vesper, but 90% of the time, these women with ludicrous names are a pastime Bond indulges in whenever he’s not shooting someone. It doesn’t help that most of them have names that even some strippers would roll their eyes at. Pussy Galore? Holly Goodhead? Plenty O’Toole?! Let’s be fair here.

    Renly – Bond is very concerned with how he looks. Though Connery and Craig usually keep Bond’s “poshness” to a minimum, Brosnan and Moore are all over dressing the part. Ridiculously expensive suits and watches. Unbelievable cars (which, granted, are par for the course in Bond’s world). Even burly man Craig is a bit of a prima donna. Look at the way he throws on the tux and fusses over his bow tie in Casino Royale or the undeniably “Bondian” move of checking his cuffs after leaping into a speeding train-car in Skyfall.

    Stannis – M says it herself in Skyfall (and Bond agrees) that 007 is an “exemplar of British fortitude.” The cool yet rigid attitude of the Brits could be Stannis if that stick in the mud ever took a second to stop furrowing his brow. If any character in ASOIAF is going to “keep calm and carry on,” it’s Stannis.

    Regardless, I heartily endorse you post.

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